There's a very loud chorus from those who aren't lifestyle lolitas that "lolita is just clothes". But you have to admit that the lifestyle lolitas are shouting collectively louder.
I recently went to a meetup where the crew for the Loligirls documentary was filming for their full length production. They asked us what we lolitas usually talked about at meetups and proceeded to throw out examples. "Makeup tips? Favorite brands?" they asked. Us girls looked around at each other, unsure how to express that we had just got done with a rousing bout of crude toilet humor. I get asked by friends, "So, do you sit around at home and drink tea and pretend you're living in Victorian times?" And I always have to explain that while there could be some girls out there like that, once I'm home I'm usually lazing around in PJ pants playing on the internet or doing homework. Whenever you see lolitas being filmed, say on the news, and they're in there rooms, everything is always pink and fluffy. We've been painted with a very broad brush full of rainbows and unicorns and soft fuzzies. And it's because us "normal" girls don't stand out as well as the much more extreme lifestylers.
I just don't understand the rationalization that someone who dresses different = someone who acts different. Dressed like cupcakes, we're still normal girls underneath, and I think even a lot of lolitas need to come to this realization. We're not doing any good in canceling out the thoughts of bypassers that we're strange when most of us come home to a pile of pastel that should be in a nursery. (Barring that you actually have a child and a nursery. xD) Most of us are in our late teens and early twenties. It's time for us to start making a place in life for ourselves through college, jobs, and careers. Yes, lolita is a great escape from the day to day pressures of normal life and an escape is good from time to time. But eventually the clothes have to come off. Most of us aren't tittering school girls blushing behind our parasols. We are young women, ready to take on the world. And it's time that we start dispersing these beliefs that we are just big girls trying to be little girls still. I'm not saying stop doing what you love and try to fit in to a niche the rest of the world has set up. I'm just saying that there are times when you really should take off that tiara.
Happiness, by Takemoto Novala
5 weeks ago